Today I put a little dove made of clay between the roots of Nadine’s tree. I cannot recall the details but she received it from some relative sometime and we developped some banter from it that turned into a running gag for some time. Take it as a symbol for the fun we both could gain from the small things in life.

My mother once told me that she envied us for this gift. Whenever we visited her and got up in the morning, we were able to laugh together. I can’t tell you how much I miss this already.

Being the one who planned the service, chose the songs and wrote the speech I’m propably the wrong person to asses it. Nevertheless I need to say that I experienced it extremely personal and heartbreaking. I’m astonished how much beauty can be derived from sadness. And I want to thank everybody who made his or her way to the Waldfriedhof to pay Nadine her last respects or who took part by listening to the songs and reading the speech somewhere else in the world.

I returned to Nadine’s tree in the evening after the wake and around noon the next day. During my first visit there was slight snowfall, during the second the sun started shining through the tree branches. Both times the place appeared beautiful and appropriate to the discreet beauty of her mind. If anybody is planning to visit this place let me know – maybe we can go there together or meet there.

I’m going to leave the house now for Nadine’s funeral service. I don’t know who will be around but I’m sure many of you are too far away to attend. But you can take part anyway: I want to offer you a pdf-download with the songs (linked to YouTube) that will be played and the text of the speech I wrote.

As I expect the situation to be way too emotional for me, Nadine’s cousin Daniel is going to read it. During the third song we will leave the hall and walk Nadine’s urn towards her tree. There, her favourite song will be played and one of her paintings from art therapy will be shown. May her honorable character and the light of her steadfast love always shine to us from the roots of her hemlock.

Funeral Speech

Trauerrede