I already told you that we didn’t make it to the Primavera Sound Festival in Barcelona in spring. Last year, we met friends from Munich there and shared a nice time. They went again this year and were so kind to gift Nadine the annual festival mug afterwards. She is now using it for drinking her homeopathic calendula tea on a daily basis.

Until a short time ago, we were hoping to visit the Primavera Club Festival instead. This is a smaller version of the festival that takes place in several venues in the city center end of October. There you can see a handful of newcomer bands each evening for three days in a relaxed an non-crowded atmosphere.  But Nadine’s breakdown spoiled this plan too.

Even though her doctor allowed us to do whatever we want to do, there isn’t much sense to the idea right now. Medically speaking, Nadine is suffering from a proximal paresis in her left leg, which makes a city trip impossible. She is walking stiff, unbalanced and insecure with hills and stairs being almost insurmountable obstacles. The origin ist still unknown, but the doctors in the Katharinenhospital do not relate it to the problems in her head. Next week, we’re trying to get hold of the results from the test of her nerve liquor and will go and see her family doctor.

After an almost sleepless night we went to see Nadine’s doctor this morning. He told us that the situation is very very serious, what we were already expecting after the pictures from the last magnetic resonance theraphy. The results of the other examinations weren’t available yet, but they aren’t crucial compared to what’s going on in Nadine’s head anyway.

The situation might be very serious, but isn’t  hopeless. There was consent among the members of the tumor conference to try Capetcitabin, a chemotheraphy that can be administered orally. Four pills a day for two weeks are followed by a break of one week, then the whole cycle will be repeated four more times. After that, in January, the next staging examination can be conducted. So all our hope is on Capetcitabin now, which is also known under the brand name Xeloda, to break through the blood-brain barrier and cause positive effects in Nadine’s head.

There are no restrictions to everyday life. We can go wherever we liket to go and do whatever we want to do, as long Nadine has enough power and is capable to. How fit she will be in the near future is hard to predict, because she is still suffering from some effects most likely related to her breakdown. So we have to wait and see – which is what we always have to do in any respect…

Nadine was released from hospital today about midday. She is home now and went to bed in the early afternoon feeling very exhausted. Her head is clear but she is unstable on her feet, having some problems with her left leg.

My mother came around to pick her up from hospital and drove her to another clinic for another test. All the necessary ones are done now but we still have to wait for a few results. Maybe the cause of her breakdown will never be revealed.  Until now, the facts simply do not match any theories.

On Thursday morning, we will be told about the result of the examination of her nerve liquor. In the same meeting, Nadine’s doctor is going to inform us about the suggestions  for her further treatment. These will be developped in an interdisciplinary tumor conference tomorrow.