When I arrived at work yesterday morning, Nadine had already called my office number. My collegue informed me that she was stuttering so I turned on my heel and went back home again. I found her hardly adressable and mumbling senseless syllables. We got another ride in an ambulance with sirens to the Katharinenhospital then.

This time she recovered quicker than during her other breakdowns. The doctors couldn’t detect any change in her medical state and left us the choice between taking her in stationary or sending us home again. As there would be no medical benefit with staying in hospital we elected for our home. It seems like we have to live with these unexplained breakdowns.

The main task right know is too keep her from vomiting – she needs to take in medicine, food and water. If this doesn’t work I’ll have to return her to hospital so that her stuff can be delivered intravenous. So far everything worked quite well: She managed to keep in two rounds of pills plus some pulped baby food this morning. Later, I will give her some noodle soup.

In the picture you can see her the way I left her on the couch when I went shopping for groceries. She listened to the Moola Mantra and fell sound asleep really quick. Although she lost one earplug, she didn’t hear me when I returned and roamed around in the kitchen.  With the music already finished, she still sleeps while I’m typing these words.

No, we’re not in Australia – the picture was taken in the children’s clinic that finds itself attached to the Katharinenhospital. It has a nice lobby where we used to spend some time. Used to. Past tense. So yes, Nadine is back home again and will sleep in her own bed for the first time in a fortnight – what a relief!

The downside is that she is still walking very insecure and we need more help again during the days I’m at work. But, no doubt, we will manage that.

The new chemotherapy starts next Tuesday and is going to be combined with the old one. It is called Methotrexat (MTX) and will be administered intrathecal twice a week. The idea is to get her nerve liqour clean and cause effects in the brain and spine at the same time. The doctors say that some patients do improve hugely from this treatment while others almost don’t benefit at all. So keep your fingers crossed that Nadine is lucky this time.

On Tuesday, propably one of the last sunny autumn days for this year, we spent the afternoon in the university park across the street of Katharinenhospital. And: We had vistors, one of them always being the perfect person to lift Nadine’s spirits…

As you might guess from the picture, her paresis is still an issue. Nadine is not unable to walk, but she is staggering insecurely so that we have to use a walking frame or, for longer distances, a wheelchair. After taking new pictures of her lower back, the doctors relate this problem to the cancer located at her lower spine. It didn’t grow a lot, but sometimes even small changes may cause big effects – especially when nerves are concerned.

But the major problem remain the tumors in her head. The doctors spotted progressions and therefore suggested another change in therapy: they now recommend a chemotheraphy which is injected into the nerve liqouor directly and is known for being able to pass the blood-brain-barrier. They are still thinking about whether it should be applied seperately or in addition to the recently started Capecetabin. All this will be discussed with her leading oncologist until Monday.

She has to stay in hospital until Tuesday because she still needs to get intravenous medication against her almost healed zoster three times a day. The move to the palliative care did never happen, so you still find her on station I1 in room 16.